Life Was Never What I Wanted It To Be

Life was never what I wanted it to be

I wanted peace I got sorrow

I drove towards wisdom

Got this one thing right

Wanted to be near everyone

Distances kept on increasing

Wanted to learn everything

Career didn't allow

Wanted to be loved

But only I loved

Wanted to teach everyone good

I myself got changed

Life was never what I wanted it to be

I lost my ability to decide

I lost my ability to judge

I lost my ability to learn

I lost my ability to think

I lost the peaceful me

I lost the soulful me

I lost the carefree me

Life was never what I wanted it to be

12/14/2017 09:04:00 pm Share:

A few Lines

Why do I feel sorrow.
Why does it feel hollow.
Is it just because she's hurt.
Or my heart is in confused dirt.

The mind says to withdraw
The compassion disagrees
This longing is for what.
I can't figure out.

Things are always complicated.
When will they be simple.
I hate this state of confusion.
Is there really a solution.

Am I doing the right thing
Am I doing really anything
Or everything is on its own
And I just go with the tone.

Sometimes I feel I am stupid.
I know nothing about cupid.
All this is for the first time
I am a noob in this dime.

But is it even real
The feel that it's surreal
Might be my misinterpretations
And my own false ideation.

6/02/2017 11:16:00 pm Share:

It's Strange!

I am confused and scared about what is happening to me. Is it happening again? Or is it happening for the first time because it never happened earlier? Or is it not what I think it is? It's just a few hours and I am missing the conversation/voice. How can this happen. When I think of post exam time, how will it be? How will I be able to sustain. Is it even real? Or just a play of some biological components? It's enjoyable but doesn't this kind of craving even for conversation mean that it's not the real thing, just a phase thing that has many names around. Moreover how can so many things match and yet many don't? I don't think it's this easy and accessible, right in front of you, to get the traits, qualities, characters and frequency you have been looking for, when all this while it was all there right in the foreground.

But maybe that's a different realm to discuss on and has its own dynamics. The reason for its abstraction might be because of my indifference to these things and the tedium or fear or exhaustion that I was going through regarding these. For one to see things, there should also be interest on the subject, right? But what has happened now? It was all unwanted, involuntary. I have no clue how it is going or where it is going and how did it even come to that or has it even come to any of that I am talking about in the first place. Maybe I am speculating too much and none of it has any reality to it. Well I fear the bad end and that's why I should not allow these things to haunt my mind. But whatever it is, it is filling me with positivity and if I see the recent past and my performance as an individual, I see myself at a good place. Things have definitely improved. Let's see how long it stays.

4/23/2017 05:27:00 pm Share:

Bidhi Tumi (Bangla Poem)

The following poem has been written by a sister of mine whose pen name is given at the end of the poem below.

Bidhi Tumi

Bidhi tumi e jano tomar khela.

Ki tumi chao, ki tumi pao.

Aro ki ki tomar ichha....

Jani tumi amar porikhha nichho..

Tabuo ami cheshta korbo

Amar sesh roktobindu porjonto

Amar biswash sotyi e sotyi

Naki sob amar moner kolpona matro..

Korunamoy ki sotyi e amar opor koruna korben

Naki tini nisthur ,nirdoy...

Jani e mon sudhu taanr choronashrito

Tobu o bichar o aabege abodhho.

Moher bondhon chinno koro probhu..

Mukti dao ,gyan dao ,hridoy e nibid shanti dao.

Tomar preme biswash dao.

-Parna

4/22/2017 09:58:00 pm Share:

Aamaar Nirobotai Tumi Aachho (Bengali Poem)

The following poem has been written by a sister of mine whose pen name is given at the end of the poem below.

আমার নীরবতাই তুমি আছো

আমার নীরবতাই তুমি আছো

আমার আকুলতায় তুমি আছো

আমার সজলতাই তুমি আছো

আমার মনে-প্রাণে তুমি আছো

আমার অনন্ত-বাহিরে তুমি আছো

আমার হাঁসি-কান্নাতে তুমি আছো

আমার প্রতি স্ত্রীলে তুমি আছো

আমার অন্তরে তুমি আছো

আমার প্রতি গানে তুমি আছো

আমার জীবনের প্রতি ছন্দে তুমি আছো

আমার হৃদযন্ত্রণে তুমি আছো

আমার কথাতে তুমি আছো

আমার ভাষাতে তুমি আছো

আমার রন্ধ্রে রন্ধ্রে তুমি আছো

প্রতি ছন্দে তুমি আছো

-Parna

4/22/2017 09:53:00 pm Share:

Prem Ki Chao Tumi (Bangla poem)

The following poem has been written by a sister of mine whose pen name is given at the end of the poem below.

প্রেম কি চাও তুমি

কহ প্রেম কি চাও তুমি

আরো কি কিছু চাওযার আছে আমার কাছে ।

নিয়েছো তো আমাকেই আমার থেকে

জ্বালায়েছ প্রেমবহ্নি আমার হৃদয়ে আলো হতে ।

আর কি চাও বলো

আমি দিতে রাজি আছি যা কিছু তুমি চাও ।

সবই তো দিয়েছি তোমাকে, আর কিছু যে নেই আমার ।

করেছি উজাড় আপনারে শুধু তোমার জন্য

তুমি কেমন বলো তো ?

যত চেষ্টা করি বুঝতে তোমাকে

ততই গড়িয়ে যায় ।

কে তুমি কীই বা তোমার স্বরূপ

কিছুতেই খুঁজে না পাই ।

তুমি যে মনে হও অনন্ত অপরিসীম

তবু কেন সীমানা বেঁয়ে যাও ।

পার না তুমি সকল সীমানা ছাড়িয়ে যেতে

ভাসিয়ে নিয়ে যেতে তোমার অনন্ত প্রান্তে ।

তাই তো আমি তোমার অনন্ত অপেক্ষায় রইলাম ।

-Parna

4/22/2017 09:02:00 pm Share:

Kichhu Aachhe Kichhu Nei (Bangla Poem)

The following poem has been written by a sister of mine whose pen name is given at the end of the poem below.

কিছু আছে কিছু নেই

কিছু আছে কিছু নেই

হয়তো বা অনেক কিছুই বা সবকিছুই  আছে

তবু কেন মনে হয় কিছুই নেই ।

নেই নেই, কেন নেই

কীই বা নেই

কিছু কি নেই বা সত্যিই কিছু আছে ।

কীই বা আছে

আবার যদি আছে তো কেনই বা আছে ।

আছে যদি হোক সে

করি কেন নেই নেই

এই আছে, এই নেই, তবু কেন নেই নেই ।

আমিও কি সত্যিই আছি

নাকি আমিও নেই ।

যদি আছি আমি তবে

কীই বা নেই ।

-Parna

4/22/2017 07:07:00 pm Share:

Ekta Sundor Golpo (Bengali Poem)

The following poem has been written by a sister of mine whose pen name is given at the end of the poem below.

একটা সুন্দর গল্প

লিখছি একটা সুন্দর গল্প,

দুপুরের আকাশের সীমানা ছাড়িয়ে,

সূদুরের এক মেয়ের গল্প

সুন্দর তার কল্পনা,

মিষ্টি তার হাসি,

কালো ঘন তার আঁখী |

দেখেছিলাম তাকে একদিন,

কোনো এক বসন্তের বিকেলে

মনে আছে সেদিনের তার সেই সদ্যস্নাত মুখখানা |

তার হয়তো মনে নেই.

কী সুন্দর আর পবিত্র দেখতে লাগছিল তাকে,

যেন প্রকৃতি নিজের হাতে রঙতুলি দিয়ে এঁকে দিয়ে গেছেন

তার চুল দিয়ে তখনো ঝরছিল জলের বিন্দু বিন্দু কণা

বৃষ্টির ফোঁটার মতো গড়িয়ে গড়িয়ে পড়ছিল ,তার কোমর বেয়ে |

সোনালী রঙের যে কাপড়টা সে পরেছিলো,

সেটা তাকে সোনার আভায় দীপ্ত করে তুলেছিল...

মনে হয়েছিল সে যেন কোনো এক ডানাকাটা পরী |

-Parna 

4/22/2017 06:49:00 pm Share:

Xiaomi Redmi 4A at ₹6000

Is Redmi 4A good enough at ₹6K?

Xiaomi has launched a series of android smartphones in the budget segment of Indian market. Among them, the most incredible mobile is the Redmi 4A as of now which comes at a price of six thousand rupees. But is the phone at par with the value it’s stipulating?

The phone has a decent finish with premium metal finish at the rear. It is light and holds easy on hand due to its perfect size, nor very big neither very small. The IPS panel sports a 296 ppi pixel density. The screen size is five inches which is good enough for people wanting to watch high definition videos or games on the device. It is good given the price. The screen has wide viewing angles and there are no glitches on screen. The pixel formation is quite good too. The screen resolution at 720x1280 pixels is good enough for a five inch phone which produces 72% NTSC colour gamut. The front panel has three touch buttons at the bottom of screen. The front panel also has an LED along with the camera and proximity sensor. The back panel has a camera of thirteen megapixels. The best part of the camera is auto focus and video capturing of 1080p at 30 fps. The images produced have amazing detail with the correct colours. The speaker is placed just beside the camera. The phone boasts of dual 4G micro-SIM slots with dual standby with VoLTE support. The most surprising part is its RAM of 2 GB and processor which is a Quad-core 1.4 GHz Cortex-A53 on the Qualcomm MSM8917 Snapdragon 425 chipset. The phone has micro SD slot expandable up to 256 GB. It also has an internal memory of 16 GB which is a killer at this price. The front camera of 5 megapixels shoots high definition videos of 720p at 30 frames per second. The phone also has radio. It comes with Wi-Fi, Bluetooth 4.0 and A-GPS, GLONASS, BDS.

The phone has the battery of 3120 mAh. The device also sports infrared sensor. The OS installed is Android 6 marshmallow.

Overall, the phone is a game changer in the budget segment of smartphones and is certainly the best phone under this price because of the amazing build quality from Xiaomi.

References:

• <http://www.gsmarena.com/xiaomi_redmi_4a-8420.php>
• < http://www.mi.com/in/redmi4a/specs/>

4/21/2017 09:45:00 pm Share:

Net Neutrality

Net Neutrality

Net neutrality is the neutrality of internet. It means an internet where there is no discrimination on accessing of websites or internet services on the basis of speed or data packets or websites. Internet, as always was neutral, should always be kept neutral for development to flourish and innovation to take place.

The internet in most parts of the world is neutral now including India. The White House states net neutrality as: “An entrepreneur's fledgling company should have the same chance to succeed as established corporations, and that access to a high school student's blog shouldn't be unfairly slowed down to make way for advertisers with more money.” Recent developments in India about net neutrality has surged up as a grave issue. The Indian telecom company Airtel has proposed a plan which will allow its users to access certain mobile apps for free with charges being paid by the app makers. Facebook’s Internet.org initiative also imposes threat in the concept of open internet in India. Internet.org allows users to access a selected bunch of sites without any charges through its domain. Facebook defends itself saying Internet.org would allow poor people to gain access to the internet. But this would actually mean poor people getting only a selected number of websites which would have paid Facebook for allowing them in Internet.org. This leads to data packet discrimination. After the internet gets into the hands of telecom operators and they pose restrictions on websites, users will need to subscribe to different types of services and particular websites in order to be able to access them. Start-ups would have to pay huge amounts to telecom operators to even allow their websites or app services to be accessed by people. This would lead to more money for the telecom operators but would also diminish the entrepreneurial aspirations of millions. Giving gateway to the telecom operators for their choice of internet allowance would fetch them good revenue which, in argue with net neutrality, could be used for advancement in network infrastructures and upgradations. But these will eventually only promote those sites which are rich. Famous will get more famous while smaller ventures will not get any scope of developing and growing further.

The freedom of the internet is of utmost importance for the good of the society. It is a platform which needs to be kept open for any individual, company, organization or group to prevent any monopolistic upsurge.

References:

• 20 April 2015 <https://www.whitehouse.gov/net-neutrality>
• “Net neutrality” IBN Live. 19 April 2015. 20 April 2015 <http://ibnlive.in.com/news/net-neutrality-airtel-ceo-gopal-vittal-sends-email-to-customers-to-clear-the-air-about-airtel-zero-read-the-full-text/540686-11.html>

4/21/2017 09:08:00 pm Share:

Camping Trip

Camping Trip

It was the summer vacation of my fifth standard. My school was taking kids to a camping expedition organised by Tata Steel Adventure Foundation. The camp was held in Tumung. It is a village twenty kilometers away from Jamshedpur. It has locations for rock climbing, bouldering and caving.

I along with my friends reached the reporting place, JRD Tata Sports Complex early in the morning. Candidates were told to bring track suits, sports shoes, cap, sun glasses, writing material and torch along with normal things required for two days and one night stay. At the TSAF office we were given sleeping bags. It took us nearly an hour to reach the camp site. After the breakfast of boiled eggs and raajma, we were divided into groups of five. I had only one classmate in my group and the rest were seniors. Instructors gave us materials and a brief demo to set up tent. Groups were given tasks and at last the group with most points would win. First task was to hold a rope forming a circle and without leaving the rope we had to form a star holding the rope. Second task was to reach a specified end point with the group circling the whole perimeter of the site. There were numerous obstacles and hurdles on the way. We had to crawl two hundred metres under barbed wires. There was a wall of webbed ropes twenty feet high. Climbing that was hard. Climbing down the other side was harder. We had to cross a hundred metre rope tied between two trees, upside down holding the rope with hands and legs forming a loop. There was a long track full of stones and rough terrain making it hard to run fast. At the end of the perimeter there was a large pool full of mud and water. We had to swing to other side of the pool using a rope hanging above it. At night after dinner we were shown the documentary of Bachendri Pal’s Mt. Everest ascent.

The next day we had to cover the same perimeter again. We were to find hidden signs containing next location coordinates using compass. We climbed a mountain and came down abseiling. We also went through caves, rock craters and holes. We talked and took photos with Bachendri Pal. She signed autographs too.

The expedition was highly educational. It taught team-coordination, leadership, self-volunteering, surviving techniques and increased physical strength.

4/21/2017 09:02:00 pm Share:

Brain Transplant

Brain Transplant

The field of medical science is constantly evolving and now it has reached such a point that doctors are planning to perform brain transplants. It has been done successfully with some animals but now doctors hope to perform this on humans. I reckon the idea itself of brain transplantation is a very scary and devastating one, let alone the performing of the procedure because of its numerous problems.

Brain transplant has been successful on animals but that doesn’t mean it will be a success in human counterparts too. If anything is more complex than the Universe, it is the human brain. It is very difficult to connect each and every neurons which send and receive signals from the whole body, in their correct positions. That’s nearly impossible to reconnect all nerve endings correctly. It is highly possible that the body may reject the new brain as it has tendency to act on things which are foreign to it. Psychological effects may also arise. Even if the transplant is successful the person will no longer have his own identity in whole. The person will be distorted in parts as the uniqueness will disappear. You would feel trapped inside the body of another person. The advancement of technology is very beneficial to the world, but I don’t believe this medical technology of brain transplantation is going to help anyone. It will only create havoc if not good. We were born with our own brain which we have developed ourselves, from childhood to adolescence. The mind that we ourselves have developed into who we are, shouldn’t be messed with and given to another person in any case. People who died with healthy brain should also not have their brain put into someone else. Another question is should the brain be of the same age as the person who needs it? This could also bring up other factors such as intelligence, gender or physical problems a person had before death. Another problem would be to determine the duration up to which a brain can be kept alive after death and that too how without damage.

Finally, my thinking about this type of surgery is that it should be avoided on humans until doctors have overcome all the problems and the negative prospects associated with it as it could result in a hitherto never experienced level and quality of insanity.

References:

• BEC Crew. “World’s first head transplant volunteer could experience something worse than death.” Science Alert. 10 April 2015. 20 April 2015 <http://www.sciencealert.com/world-s-first-head-transplant-volunteer-could-experience-something-worse-than-death>
• Hooton. Cristopher. “Man undergoing head transplant could experience something 'a lot worse than death', says neurological expert.” The Independent. 9 April 2015. 20 April 2015 <http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/man-undergoing-head-transplant-could-experience-something-a-lot-worse-than-death-says-neurological-expert-10164423.html>

4/21/2017 08:59:00 pm Share:

Biological Warfare - research paper

Biological Warfare

This was a research paper I wrote for my second semester course Rhetoric and Composition.

People who find this paper useful may refer to it.

4/21/2017 08:39:00 pm Share:

Foresee Digital Business

Digital Business is business that is based on digital media like the Internet, computers or smartphones (not limited to digital devices like IoT but also others). It is the business that derives most of its working infrastructure from digital platforms.

Over the past few years we have seen the emergence of digital web service companies as big behemoths of present business economy. Companies like Uber are solely driving their revenue from the digital frontier without any kind of physical capital investment on the end products of their business, i.e., cars. Recent outburst of video on demand services like Netflix has become huge compared to the traditional companies without digital business. Amazon, Facebook, Google and many other digital businesses are booming as more and more people get acquainted with the World Wide Web.

Traditional business houses that are switching to digital business by using the perks of SAAS (software as a service) are doing well compared to the ones non adaptive of technology. Now firms that will invest some amount of their revenue to alter their current working mechanism to cloud based solutions will get a benefit in the long run. This is because keeping the resource that is being used to drive the company on the cloud helps in sharing the resource in remote branches of the company. The custom tailoring of resources for specific usage is also very convenient in case of cloud based platforms.

Now most of the transactions we see are either cash or digital money of their respective national currency. We are already seeing transactions done in bitcoins. A bitcoin is a type of digital currency in which encryption techniques are used to regulate the generation of units of currency and verify the transfer of funds, operating independently of a central bank. But in the near future we may see a digital economy where most transactions are done using blockchain which is a distributed database that maintains a continuously growing list of ordered records called blocks. Each block contains a timestamp and a link to a previous block. This way we have assured prevention of any kind of breach in the security of the transaction data.

Now it has been seen that most of the non-digital business companies find it hard to incorporate digital platforms in their existing infrastructure. There is a solution to this problem. Companies instead of channelling their IT department to migrate their system to digital may adopt a feasible technology start-up to begin with which can later power their digital business.

With the invention of better techniques to implement technologies like machine learning and internet of things, digital businesses are going to thrive at their zenith in the coming years. New ideas like AI implementation in customer relations will improve market capturing and drive growth.

In future there will be huge stress on governments all over the world to transform every transaction into the digital form to eliminate cases of theft, stealing, or black economy. The Government of India is already on its heels to make the Digital India initiative successful and effective. So it is best for every company or start-up to focus on digital business as it is going to be the most successful domain in business.

4/17/2017 07:12:00 pm Share:

We Judge

People talk about girls being judged on their character depending on the kind of attire they wear. But do we talk about the problem of judging from the base. If you look closely in your own thoughts, inside our own self, most of us will find that we judge pretty much everything. People who are feminist, people who are of  contemporary thoughts, people who are ready to embrace the open world thinking, they all judge. We all judge.

I consider myself an individual who is indifferent to any kind of bias including but not limited to gender, cast, race, religion, ethnicity, or anything. But today I realised how wrong I was.

A small incident that happened earlier in the evening today brought me down from my false sense of being a bias free individual. There is a small shop beside my hostel building which is quite famous among the college students as their favourite place for smoking. Behind the shop and alongside the hostel building there is a free space, partially hidden from the bustle of the road. Most folks smoke their life out sitting on the low-rise boundary wall. Today when my friend(ex-roommate) called me to meet him there, as he usually does, I saw one of the seniors of our hostel. The immediate thought that came to my mind was, "He also smokes!". Now think about this situation. I hardly know that guy but had a previous notion of him being a decent fellow, and hence the shock. But is it right. How do I judge that person to be a smoker or not just by the place where I saw him. In reality he was there to talk with his friends just like me. What is notable here is the thing that I found out how big a hypocrite I am. I assume students to be non descent if they smoke.

If I delve into it to the finest details I find that the way we are brought up is the cause of all these. The way we are trained from childhood is how our mind shapes up to be later. The society and their ripples is what we are fed right from the beginning. Just a year back I had made myself believe that alcohol or cigarette are not necessarily the parameters for a good or bad person. But even then my brain unconsciously judges people on their choices and activities.
Is it because of my own mindset or is it because of the mindset I have developed as a result of my upbringing in which society had a great role to play?

Well, I still try to not judge. But for us Indians to do so, is really difficult. Maybe the future generations will be better in this.

4/13/2017 08:49:00 pm Share:

Padhaku

I don't know why people invented that word. That word is no short of acting as a nuclear weapon for an individual like me who isn't strong enough for things like those. There might be people like me who may feel that serious accusations like 'padhaku' should not be put unless and until it's really the fact. When I don't study at all and people call me padhaku I go into a state of lapse. Earlier I used to defend, now I am out of clue as my defence mechanism has accepted defeat.

Is it because you did well in school you're a padhaku, no matter how much time has passed after school?
Even after you've done very poor in plus two, you are a padhaku?
Even after you're not doing your graduation from any elite institute, you're a padhaku!
Even after you're just average in college, you're a padhaku!
Even after you've come to a stage that you start hating studies or you don't want people to see you with books (even if you're really not studying) just because you don't want them to consider/label you a padhaku.

Even after all this you would still find souls who launch that nuclear weapon upon you, not that they think about what this verbal wound could cause, but they're the people right? They have every right to say or feel whatever they want. I am yet to find out a solution to this. But because of this some may say, why or how does it matter to me. For them, they would never know it's how I am hard-wired. It's how I function or maybe it's true that I am weak, feeble.

P.S: 'Padhaku' is a hindi word which literally means 'Studious' but is used in a bullying way as an expletive/swear.

2/01/2017 10:03:00 pm Share: