A letter to a friend

Dear Friend,

दोस्त तो तुम अब भी हो पर अब ये बातें बताता नही हूँ तुम्हे। पहले अपनी तकलीफ़ बाँट लेता था तुमसे। अब जब तुम भी अपनी दुनिया में हो तो मन नहीं करता। वो भी क्या बार बार एक ही चीज़ का दुखड़ा गाना। तुम्हे भी तो बोरियत हो जाएगी। अब तो हमें आदत हो गयी है ग़लत इंसान से मोहब्बत करने की। इसीलिए अब किसी और के बारे में सोचते भी नहीं।

अब भी रात को जब दर्द बढ़ता है तो दिल करता है कि तुम्हे बताऊं। पर फिर सोचता हूँ इससे न तो कुछ बदलेगा, उल्टा बेकार की बातें तुम्हे झेलनी पड़ेंगी। भले ही तुम्हारा मन हो या ना हो सुनने का। इसलिए अब और परेशान नही करता। नही चाहता के डर सोचो की ये देखो ये लड़का फिर से अपना रोना शुरू कर दिया। और बात सही भी है।

में बदल इसलिए भी गया हूँ क्योंकि पहले जैसा अब कुछ भी कहाँ रह गया है। पहले में और तुम ही थे। अब तो कोई और ज़्यादा आ गया है। और तब की बात अलग थी। अबकी बार ये जो दिल टूटा है, ये ना जुड़ेगा। Maturity के बाद जब ऐसा होता है तो शायद अब ये पूरी जिंदगी के लिए है। तब तो थोड़ा बचपना था ही। 

तुम्हारा बदला हुआ दोस्त

3/28/2020 12:50:00 am Share:

I may have been wrong

Recently I have been going through a lot of poetry and the Urdu literature. I came to know about Sahir Ludhianvi and Amrita Pritam and Imroz. Now after knowing about them, I feel maybe I was wrong. I have been very selfish and a bad person. If we think of Imroz, despite him knowing that Amrita was and always will be in love with Sahir, he never ended his association with Amrita. It is told that he never even said to Amrita how much he was in love with her. Even then they lived together in the same house but in different rooms, accompanied her everywhere, was always there to help her in anyway possible untill her death. And Amrita remained in love with Sahir, although they never came together despite Sahir also being in love with Amrita. Sahir remained unmarried and in solitude his whole life.

Thinking about them in today's times, I feel I am very very old fashioned and I have been born in the wrong time. Not only did I stop all association with her, I even tried to defer all her attempts of communicating with me regularly. But the thing is, I was and am in pain about that. And I can't bear it all the more. I thought if I remove this person from my life, maybe my pain will lessen as I am reducing a huge source of despair from my life in form of her because with communication I was knowing about her new developments talking to her, which was making me more sad. I thought removing her would make the old memories hazy enough and slowly I will forget them. I was selfish and only wanted my pain to lessen. Maybe I was wrong, but Imroz at least got to stay with her. He could be with her which I couldn't. 

I don't know anymore. Yes, maybe I am selfish and I don't want to be in this constant state of gloom and melancholy.

https://www.amarujala.com/amp/news-archives/india-news-archives/a-unique-love-story-of-amrita-pritam-and-imroz-hindi-news-sy

https://antiserious.com/silences-that-never-broke-amrita-sahir-and-imroz-34bf6dd6fef

3/16/2020 03:23:00 pm Share:

Movies and Songs

These are some of the very good movies about love and heartbreak. All of these I have enjoyed watching and some of them are as real as it gets. This list is not exhaustive.

Meri Pyari Bindu

500 Days Of Summer

Masaan

Raanjhana

PS I Love You

October

Bojhena Shey Bojhena

My Best Friend's Wedding

Akashvani

Ghajini

Highway

Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam

City Lights (1931)

Notting Hill

Ek Main Aur Ek Tu

These are some of the songs (please do not consider the quality/value of video of these songs, just the audio) that are quite emotional and are attached to the same topic as above. Combined with the lyrics and melody/tune, these are really good. This list is not exhaustive.

Saaware - Phantom

Tere Bin Ho Na Sakega Guzara

Maine Dil Se Kaha

Kaise Mujhe Tum Mil Gayi

Alvida - Life In A Metro

Barhaan Dil Mein - Mr Singh Mrs Mehta

Somebody's Me

Emptiness (Tune Mere Jaana)

Baatein Ye Kabhi Na - Khamoshiyan

Dard - Sarbjit

Tum Hi Aana - Marjaavaan

Humdard - Ek Villain

Tu Ne Jo Na Kaha - Newyork

3/09/2020 05:08:00 pm Share: